BUNGEE-JUMPING

My friend Daniel (www.danielrock.blogspot.com) just wrote a post that included a bit that compares cancer to Christians. In that he says : "everyone likes you if you have cancer". Well, that just reminded me of something I've thought of numerous times, but I don't believe have ever expressed to anyone.

I occasionally read obituries. It's kind of a game to see if I can figure out what kind of people they are just by the standard form that everyone seems to follow. (sidenote - if I die and someone wants to write one of these soulless, bland obits, shoot them and write me one I deserve, good or bad. Thanking you in avance)

People die of cancer, lots of them. People die of heart disease, lots of them. People die of.........lots of them. So, if everyone would so kindly please stop saying "XYZ died after a long and courageous battle with cancer". There is nothing courageous about getting cancer. You didn't throw yourself in front a speeding cancer cell to save someone. You just got it. No work or intestinal fortitude required. For whatever reason, your body spazzed out. You have been given no choice but to deal with it to the best of medical technology, or blow your brains out.

Now, don't bother bitching me out with sad tales of your Aunt that fought with all of her might and never complained once. Blah, blah, blah. Good for her and better for the family and friends around her. But courageous? NO. Let's be honest here. For every Aunt story, there are 10 that if told truthfully, will let you know that Uncle was a pain in the ass whilst cancer ate his body.

Courage is facing fear, knowing that what you're up against may cause you much grief, pain or death and doing it anyway, by choice. If you love thrill and are not afraid of heights, jumping out of an airplane is not courageous. If I jump out of an airplane, please do call me courageous. There are few things that I think would be scarier, so doing it would be a huge deal.

Cancer doesn't suddenly make you a saint. Living your life as a good human makes you a saint. I'm really tired of people putting their loved ones on a pedestal because they've been given this particular cross to bear. Live your everyday life with all the courage you can muster, be nice to people and then perhaps someone can write that you died after living your LIFE with courage and grace.

I know I'd prefer that.

D.